xanthan gum

Just some mechanics: Goddess is spelled wrong. The rhythm is off on L7, perhaps cut "glistening". I like the unstructured rhyme. It's refreshing. It's simple, and I appreciate it for ...

There's nothing wrong with this. In a mechanical sense, that is. But this poem doensn't make me care evne a snipit for any sort of lost souls or lamentation. I ...

Pencils red yellow blue green Some are colorful, abstract. In addition to bubbles, I think that "red, yellow, blue, green" and "colorful" are too ...colorful, if you will, for the ...

..I won't be reading that description there. Stuff like that belongs in a blog. If your poem is properly written, I should be able to relate to the situation easily ...

I'm sure there's an artistic reason why you didn't use any punctuation besides the full stops, but really...it's driving me insane. I just want to go through and go COMMA ...

I’ve never felt as warm As I do now First, this isn't very good. It's a cliche, and just a turn-off as an opener. And never been so warmed Secondly, ...

I was suggesting that you go through and simply click "enter" so that after every paragraph or line break (such as in dialouge) there is an extra space inbetween. Survey ...

First off, "And I'm faking" is an awkward line, it's not needed, and in my opinion, it should be chopped out of every stanza. The make up , it stains ...

Check your spelling. "field of nothingness" does nothing for you, and creativity is vital in the shortest of poems. L2 should be followed up with a comma. "Disappear" looks just ...

A certain intensity and harshness circle your consonants, as they drip off your tongue like watermelon seeds in summertime. They blast into resting water Blast and watermelon make me think ...

I think there are some jagged transitions that I want to point out: tightening my heartscrews and opening my mouth I laughed as hard as I could I'm not sure ...

You knew I'd get here eventually. :D Jake, clutch me with your suitcase hand and tell me, Tell you what? Simple stuff can be important.... bring the bazooka and your ...

Dress pulled stiffly back by unseen pins Girl, wind, frozen image - photograph. You accomplished that in the first line. Unseen pins is more than a little awkward; it's pratically ...

If the descent of colors is purposeful: just weeks ago we felt yellow jackets menace the thin skin The muscadine falls blue to the trail and sets off the hickory ...

I'm not sure about the elements of poetry, but I know that it lacked a meaning...besides that of the circulatory system (which isn't all that moving) had no symbolism, imagery, ...